beans, gas, dead flies, am sensing a theme.
( forgot, excellent fly, also a family pet?)
Yes Bic, we keep a small herd of fly’s around the house. They take care of themselves and help clean up the odd pile of organic matter. Alas due to the hard financial times we will be forced to part with a few.
The cat is an afterthought as the ground is frozen for a few more weeks and it would be way to much trouble to bury the ashes. Perhaps I should mix them with some super-sculpy and create a tribute?
The fly’s gotta go though. Heat bills to pay. They will be emerging in large numbers shortly and I think I can get rid of many of them and still have a viable herd for the future.
I leave the Cat herding to my Wife who is far more patient than I. No matter how hard I try I can’t get one of the worthless little beasts to fetch the paper off the porch. Eat, sleep and soil the litter box, that is all they do. It’s like having an In-Law over who just won’t leave or get a job.
Looks like Mackey this year unless something happens.
On topic -
Yes, I suppose the fly’s could be trained to do something useful, but is it worth the time. Just about the time you get one trained it fly’s off to blow eggs into some pile of rotting meat and you are forgotten.
Possible career moves for fly
- Hedge fund manager.
- Investment department at AIG
- Realtor.
- Sell mortgage backed securities.
Starts off with career prerequisite. Buzzs around crap.
I would not feel right if I did not stop by and thank you Bic.
On your suggestion I submitted a resume to AIG on behalf of one of my more astute Fly’s. Seeing no reason to think small, I went for an Executive Officers post and Arnold Fly, CFO was born. He of course quit before showing up for his first day on the job and we are now eagerly awaiting the 3 million dollar bonus promised in the initial contract. Even after the 90% tax rate that’s still fair compensation for the trouble.
Arnold is not stopping there however and we will soon be contacting the White House to inquire about a possible Cabinet Post suitable for his talents. Perhaps something in the FDA? Our hopes are high. I’m sure an invitation to appear on the Tonight Show is just days if not hours away.
According to the Attorney General of Connecticut, the fly’s bonus
was actually 3,500,000.
Supoena’s will be issued to fly’s cousin, his wife, his children.
Protestors will march on his lawn.
His name will be published and vilified by the Atorney General of New York.
He will be made to testify.
His crime…
70 hours work weeks, including Holidays, weekends, anniversaries, kids birthday,Christmas, etc, etc.
Buying Tums in the economy size.
Answering for mistakes he had nothing to do with.
Testifing before a group of dishonest, lying, two faced sons of bitches
that would not know how to survive in the private sector
Having to keep his emotions in check while some of his employees are:
- Lying to him.
- Relatives of people he has to be nice to.
- Doing a totally inept job costing thousands, but can’t be fired because
they are in a position where they know how the hole was dug and only
they know the way around without a miners hat.
Wow!!! got carried away there for a minute, have been updating my resume,
don’t know how I will survive with a salary under six million.
(Edit: don’t know the people in question at AIG, but do the people at
Merrill. Amounts that you are reading about are out of hand. But this
is the way it has been on Wall Street for at least thirty years that I know
of. What hasn’t been mentioned is that some of these people are friends
of people high up in industry. If they quit, get fired, leave, their friends
and millions of dollars go out the door with them. So you are in effect paying
someone a million but keeping 5 million in earnings)
about that garage sale…